This is what it looks like.
Please don't mind the bad artwork. I didn't really even bother to try. I just wanted to get it down really quick on paper.
The other day some guy asked me to hang out with him and offered for me to come to his house and automatically I texted my friends to ask them the question, "If a boy invites you to watch movies at his house does that mean he wants to do it with you?" and I sincerely was scared to go over there and almost took my mace along with me.
But in all honesty, men are horrible creatures. usually, as with most things my insides sway on this subject. By insides, I mean my mind and sometimes my heart. But the last time i fell I decided i still hated all men and one was okay. I don't think that one was okay. After I experienced it, anyway. Although, as mentioned before my own conflicting thoughts and my own insanity is also to blame when it comes to these things.
I'll probably use another post to explain my thoughts better, but I'll say some now. Inside my head every day is like a constant battle between several people. All of them wanting to have, think, feel, or be separate things. The one thing I know I want is gone, and there are parts inside me still fighting about it. One part knows wanting it makes me crazy, the other part, the worst part of me, doesn't shut up and keeps asking for it repeatedly, endlessly, day in and day out. It's a battle none of us will probably ever win. None of us will be able to decide who should take the lead, and all of us are too different and contradicting to mesh together.
-Kat/Little Bull
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